she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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