i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize