Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
