Christians are straight up FREAKS
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
