remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I have already put on my inside pants.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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