Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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