Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
