his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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