yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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