Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
