Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize