This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
