So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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