Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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