Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
