I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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