He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
