I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize