Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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