she woke up with a sticky ear
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
