that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
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