i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
