the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
