No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
