Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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