my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
it glows. i had to have it.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
