We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
