I hope mine doesn't look like that
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
