Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize