id be glad to
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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