i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
