I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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