We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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