the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
