she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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