just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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