Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
