his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
