i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
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