I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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