This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
my poor anus
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
