Kiss
Puke
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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