The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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