Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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