hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
