u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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