I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize