hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Randomize
