matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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