I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
